One more week of nanny life and then it’s on to the next thing God has for me. All well and good, except that He hasn’t filled me in on what that next thing is. The unknown is not a comfortable place to be. It’s an anxious place. It’s a shaky place. It’s a restless place. I don’t like it. Not one bit.
So, I find it frustrating that God keeps throwing the same word in front of my face everywhere I turn. REST.
I’m packing boxes to move for the fourth time in less than two years. How am I supposed to rest? I don’t know what the heck is going on with my life. How am I supposed to rest? I am confused, upset and disappointed. How am I supposed to rest?
Friday night, I attended the Aspire Women’s Conference with some friends. The event was on my calendar before unemployment was. I guess God knew I’d need an extra dose of truth right about now.
Gwen Smith, one of the Aspire speakers, had the nerve to get up there and talk about, of all things, REST.
Rest…right in the middle of my mess and my questions and my disappointment.
When I’m wrestling with something God wants me to know or do, I always do it in prayer. It’s that pray without ceasing thing. I can’t get away from it.
Well, today, I’m wrestling with rest. Gwen shared her take on R.E.S.T., and it’s worth sharing.
I’m worn slap out. You’d think I’d jump at the chance to rest, but rest seems unnatural at a time like this. I need to be problem-solving and job-hunting and hoop-jumping.
But You say, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-29 NIV).
Rest is what I need, Lord. And it’s the most important thing I need to be doing right now. I must R.E.S.T. to have the strength to keep moving forward in Your plan for me.
Hard times bring out my inner worry-wart. Jennifer Rothschild says worry is a form of meditation. I turn my troubles over and over in my mind until they become so large there’s no room for anything else. Please forgive me for worrying when You plainly told me not to (Matthew 6:25-34).
I choose to reflect on who You are and what Your Word says. Focusing on what’s wrong isn’t doing me a bit of good. Refocus me, Lord. I know the more I reflect on You, the more I will reflect You in my words, my attitudes and my actions. Oh Lord, You know my heart. You know I want to reflect You.
As I ponder who You are, I can’t help but engage with You. I need to know You more, Lord. I need to talk to You more. I need to listen to You more. I need You.
Gwen Smith said engaging with You won’t necessarily change my circumstances, but it will change me. I want to do life Your way, Lord. The more I connect with You, the more Your character will rub off on me. Please keep me pulled in close to Your heart, Lord. I want my heart to beat in tune with Yours.
Lord, my way isn’t working. Whatever You want to do, Lord, do it. I surrender to Your correction and Your comfort. I surrender to Your discipline and Your divine appointments. I surrender to Your will, Your way, and Your wildest dreams for my life. Where my desires don’t match up to Yours, change my mind and heart.
Lord, I feel like the man in Mark 9 who came to You, desperate, for help with his demon-possessed son.
“If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”
“If you can?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.”
Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:22-24 NIV).
I trust You, Lord, but I don’t trust You enough. Help me to take You at Your word. Help me to believe Your words are true, even when I can’t see what You’re up to. Help me believe You’ll work even this mess out for my good and Your glory (Romans 8:28).
“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust'” (Psalm 91:1-2 NIV). I will be a “whoever.” I will rest in You.
In the name of Jesus, I say AMEN